Suzanne Schaffer

Several years ago the man said that we needed a new mattress. I was not in agreement because I was quite happy with our aging, comfy bed. She and I knew each other well, she had a little spot carved out for my curves. And by curves, I mean hips. If you are a woman then you know what I mean by this. We have hips and most beds hurt these parts of our bodies. I'm a side-sleeper, I need my hips to be cushioned. He researched and decided to get a memory foam mattress. I wasn't happy. I wasn't happy when he bought it, when it was delivered, when we opened it and left it on the porch to air out, when we gave our old mattress to someone who was sleeping on a floor, when he put the new one in the room, and when we covered it with sheets and crawled in the first time. It took me about a month to warm up to it. And now it has ruined me. Travel has never been a thing I get excited about. There's just so much to do to prepare for it.  I don't want to leave the dog. - Ther...

It's no secret that I hate to fly. I really hate to fly. It kind of terrifies me. I figure if I was supposed to be up there I would have wings. I made a deal with Jesus a long time ago. I told Him that the next time I flew it would be in the rapture. He didn't tell me any different so I figured we were good with this. So the man and I were preparing to take a trip to Florida for the Assemblies of God General Council. I asked if we could take a train. The retro-chick in me is just dying to ride in a sleeper car. Because somewhere in my mind I know it'll be black and white just like in a 1940s movie. So romantic. It's set. A train it is.  Until he starts checking out the prices of flights and realizes that he can save money. And thus begins my demise. Okay, maybe that's a little melodramatic. I can do this. I mean, I'm a forty-six year old woman. People do this every day. I have a cousin who is a flight attendant, she's still alive. Certainly I...

One of the things that I hate hearing the most is how hurt someone has been by "the church" and so they quit going altogether. If everyone who has ever been hurt by someone in the church quit going to church then the buildings would be empty. Did you catch what I said there? I said hurt by someone in the church . Not hurt by the church . These are two separate things. The church doesn't hurt people. People hurt people. Trust me, I know.  We have been deeply hurt by people and after our last experience I wanted nothing to do with the ministry ever again. I remember telling my husband, as we were pulling into our current church parking lot to interview for the job, "I don't want to do this anymore." But the church isn't about me. And I'm glad that we didn't rely on my feelings as a deciding factor. You are going to be hurt by people. It happens. It is part of life. People are mean, jealous, cruel, unkind, unscrupu...

The lost art of the Thank You note is something that I've noticed for quite some time. I was raised that when someone goes out of their way for you, gives you a gift, does something special for you, that you send them a thank-you note. These used to be commonplace. Lately I've had people tell me that I don't need to send them a note every time they give my husband a holy handshake* that they know we appreciate it and that is all the thanks that they want. It's nice to be let off the hook like that, but (and this is a big but) we need to remember that not everyone feels that way. People like to know that you appreciated their time, gift, etc.  Do you need to send a note for every little thing? No. There are times when you can express your thankfulness in person or in an email or text. Though it is good to remember to do these. If someone takes you to lunch you may want to thank them in person, and again later with a text or email. If you are inclined to send a note...

I had an interesting conversation with someone the other day, a retired minister who I hadn't seen in some time. We were talking about how fun it was for him to be retired and be able to visit different churches and decide where to go. Because when you're the pastor you kind of have to go to the church where you work. It's just a thing that happens. I told him that I envied him. I love our church where we've been for the past seven years, and I don't see us leaving anytime soon, but there were churches in the past that I didn't like.  I mentioned this to him and he said, "But we need to love the body, these are the people we will be in heaven with." I agreed that we do need to love them. And I did love them, but no where in the Bible does it say that we need to like them.  For a while when we pastored at these other churches I would occasionally have people ask me if I knew of a good church in the area and I sent them elsewhere. I did not ...