Skip to main content

Worthless

I woke feeling worthless today. It's likely the perfect storm of wintery weather, hormones, a dichotomy on the scale, and the nagging cold that won't let go.

I explained it to my friend this way, "I feel like a coin in a tin can. Rattling around and making a lot of noise but not doing anything worthwhile."

All this a couple days after someone fussed over me, "Oh Suzanne, you're so awesome," she said excitedly.

I don't like being fussed over. My close friends and family know this. It makes me very uncomfortable and gives me time to think about how un-awesome I am because I know myself better than anyone else does.

I see my faults and failures. I see the ugly hiding in my heart. I see the attitude that needs changed. I see the unmet expectations and the quiet harbor I find in closing myself in a shell.

Today has been full of cold wind, unending housework, and loads of self-doubt.

I wore my inflatable crown while I ironed my husband's shirts. After all, today is the type of day I bought it for. The type of day when I need to be reminded of my worth.

My worth comes in nothing of myself. There is nothing I can do or not do that makes me worth anything. My worth only comes in knowing I am unconditionally loved by my Creator. The simple fact that Jesus loves me without reason makes me want to peek out from my self-built harbor and embrace the day, no matter what it holds. When I'm tired and weary I need only reach my hand to Him. He will meet me and hold me. He will fill me with strength to complete the day. When I take my eyes off of me and what I see as worthless and allow Him to be my focus He changes the direction of my thoughts and shows me who I am.

I am loved - Psalm 103:11
I am beautiful - 1 Peter 3:3-4
I am wonderful - Psalms 139:14
I am worth dying for  - John 3:16
I am valuable - Luke 12:7

Emotions rise and fall and feelings can be deceitful. The truth outlasts the lie.







Comments

  1. TammyFebruary 15, 2017 at 3:38 PM

    This post spoke to me, thank you. Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,but a woman who fears the Lord shall be praised. A Proverb and a lovely song by Kim Hill.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousFebruary 15, 2017 at 4:51 PM

    Thank you. Anointed.

    ReplyDelete
  3. cherieFebruary 16, 2017 at 5:31 PM

    Honest, authentic, and truth. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Selling items on Craigslist and common scams

I'm selling a couple of things on Craigslist. I've done this a few times before and always, the first interested parties I hear from are scammers. This time in my listing I specified that I will not take money orders and asked that scammers not contact me. Here's the first interested party that I heard from: mr robins journeycristina@gmail.com Is it still available for sale... I replied: Yes it is. Here's the second contact from the first interested party. Note that the name of the sender and the email of the sender are different than the ones from the first contact: Clyde Wright fisherr.mattyy@gmail.com Hello, Thanks for the swift response, just to let you know that am okay with the condition and price of the item, am ready for its purchase and my form of payment will be by sending you Check via UPS next day delivery. I'll be responsible for the pick-up and the pick up money will be included in your payment to avoid delay and to enable pick up company to s...
28 comments
Read more

The Tool Box

I can hear my husband clanging tools around in the garage. He's going through his twenty-four year collection and putting together a tool box for our twenty-two year old son.  Gulp. When did we become parents of an adult who is able to move out and live on his own? He's coming home tomorrow to collect the furniture he's chosen from our house and some other things. He's been gone for a few years but has always come home for summer and holidays. This time it's permanent. There won't be any more summers at home. I won't have to tiptoe around while he's still sleeping. I won't have to chase him out of the shower because he's been in there for a very long time. I won't have to buy Cooper cheese or boxes of Macaroni & Cheese anymore.  The tool box Wayne is putting together for him will last him many years. He'll hang pictures, tighten bolts, and fix small accidents with it. It'll stay by his side as he begins new chapters...
8 comments
Read more

Sweet Zoey

 Zoey - August 10, 2020 When we found her I didn't realize I needed her. Sure, she needed us, she was living in woods, alone, surviving on whatever she could find. She was nine months old, the vet later told me when I took her in for a check-up, still unsure I wanted to keep this undernourished mutt. We'd been on vacation in southwest Missouri, near the Arkansas border, in the middle of the woods. I was on the porch when I saw her trotting down the dirt road. A little brown dog. I whistled and she stopped to look at me from across the lawn. Then she continued on her way. Later that night, the family was watching a movie we'd brought (no cable service out there!) and suddenly this furry face popped up in the window, scaring my husband out of his seat. We fed her some people food and went to bed.  She was still there in the morning. We asked around and no one knew where she came from. We fed her some more and she stayed. The next day we went and bought some dog food, f...
5 comments
Read more